Sunday, June 8, 2014
I lay here in bed, with thoughts of you weighing heavily on my mind. Every night this happens, but tonight more so than usual. I frequently think of all our memories together over the years, and throughout all our different walks through this life. Bedtime is when I especially do this remenosing hoping to relive some of those moments, even if only through a dream. The extra pillows I bought do a lousy job of filling in the perfect fit that you made lying next to me. Jesse's girl came on the radio tonight on my way home so I thought it was suiting to listen to "Brown Eyed Girl." I used to sing that to you all the time when we first started dating. Lately my thoughts have been too confusing to put into writing or share but for some reason lying here tonight I felt the need to vent.
Love is a crazy thing. It can at often times be scary, beautiful, confusing,strengthening, uplifting or even sorrowful thing when it is taken from you. There are not many people that I can confide in like I did Adrinne and none that can comfort me the way she did. On my worst days, no matter what the circumstance, her love and support were there to comfort me. The fact that I had all of this in my wife makes me grateful, but now living without these things has proven to be more difficult than before I had ever known or felt them. Lord help me to walk the path that you meant for me to walk, guide me, give me understanding and unbreakable faith in you and your word. Take the bitterness from my heart, and let it not be hardened or isolated.